| Unit | | Definition |
|---|
| Kilometre | | The last metre of the Marathon |
| Kilogramme | | The weight of the straw that broke the camel's back |
| Killer Whale | | 1,000 whales |
| Kilowatt | | 1,000 questions |
| Pedometer | | Official Police breath test alcohol measuring device |
| Millipede | | 0·001 of the alcohol limit unit |
| Centipede | | 10 millipedes (q.v.) |
| Barometer | | Length of the Standard Cockney Market Barrow |
| Centimetre | | Perfume strength measuring device; also skunk detector |
| Nanometre | | Standard Common Market Banana Length |
| Gigameter | | Device for measuring the length or quality of dances |
| Telegram | | Weight of Standard Common Market TV set |
| Kilostere | | Medusa's Look |
|
Sent in by a member of the DSGB:
